Trevor decided today that he will be forming a "secret club". Here are the details he shared with me:

The club will consist of eight people; Hailey, Anna, Kozette, Kellan, Will, Thomas, George and Tessa.

The club will meet downstairs, where they will have a sleepover in his closet, except the kids who are small enough to fit under the bed.

They will eat juicy foods, but not crumbly ones (except chips.) Juicy foods are constituted mostly of fruit, and an example of a crumbly food is sandwiches.

I'm not sure why it's secret.

Cute stuff

Noel's pronunciation of bathroom: bat-yume.

When talking about an event that occurred at any time in the past, she used to say "yesterday." Now she says "tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow."

We went to Goodwill and she held up a plastic piece o' junk and asked "is this half off?"

Trevor has informed me that he wants a stepbrother. He also wants Todd and I to divorce and remarry so he can have two moms and two dads.

I have to tell you something...

These kids will do anything to drag out bedtime. A drink of water, cover my head, where's special bear? Noel learned from Trevor to say "I have to tell you something." But when you say "what is it?" she says, hmmm. hmmm.

The next day she says, "Trevor, I have to tell you something."

Trevor says, "what?"

She responds "Trevor, I have to tell you something."

Trevor says "You can tell me anything, Noel."

Can I stop relaxing now?

While Todd is putting the kids to bed (a lengthy process in our house), I have been washing the dishes, picking up toys and books, wiping off tables, folding laundry, etc., and wondering when to stop. The floor still needs sweeped, there's a pot soaking in the sink and some plastic bags to be washed, and once those chores are done, a string of many more awaits.

Reminded me of a funny story so I decided to stop, sit down, and blog.

Last fall, Todd went out of town for a week and a girlfriend of mine came to visit. I thought it would be helpful to have an extra set of hands. It didn't turn out exactly as I expected, as my friend is childless, single, and lives in a hotel where people cook her meals and clean her room. She was far from helpful in the everyday functioning of the home, but I enjoyed the visit and having the company and felt not the least resentful.

Most evenings, after I finally got the kids to bed, I proceeded to do the usual stuff that would normally have been done by the lucky parent that got out of bedtime duty that night. (Just the basics so that 7 am wouldn't roll around with me tripping over toys to get to the coffee, only to find a sinkful of dirty dishes and two kids ready to make another mess. Nothing fancy like cleaning the floor or scrubbing the tub, just enough to keep my sanity.) As I loaded the dishwasher, cleared the tables, and swept up the crumbs, my friend would relax on the couch with a magazine and a glass of wine.

The day came for my friend to go home, and while driving her to the airport, we had the following conversation:

Her (a massage therapist): My friend S_ has messed up priorities. She would rather spend her money on coloring her hair than getting a massage.

Me: Well, I would rather pay someone to clean my house than get a massage. That would be more relaxing for me.

Her: But, Juliette, you clean to relax!

Me: Go f*** yourself.

I didn't really say that. I just laughed. When my very energetic sister came to visit after that, all she did was relax for hours every day. Our house was so clean! But I did have to complain to my mom that all she was doing was relaxing.

My favorite store

I love Bi-mart. Where else can you buy oil and and oil filter, Yes to Carrots shampoo, organic cotton sheets and ammo for your 22* all at the same store?

*You're right, I don't have a 22, but I'm hoping you get the point. My actual purchase yesterday was as follows: oil, filter, shampoo, conditioner, 22-oz microbrews, peeps, pez dispensers, colloidal oatmeal bath, and honey sticks.

I've been eating Sunbow Farm's kale every week this spring. The best thing happened yesterday when I made this massaged kale salad with a bunch of the white kale. It has apples, avocadoes, sunflower seeds, and radishes in a lovely lemon-ginger-honey dressing. You must make it!

Blah, blah, blah

My head is spinning. I tried to start a knitting project no fewer than four times today. Unsuccessful. A dragon would be as big as a giant if they were alive. This parrot is very nice because it's a giant's bird and giants are not nice to dragons. Mom. I think this is a boy parrot. Mom. Do you think this is a boy parrot? Mom! The dragons live in a giant fire pit. They love fiery places. They love fiery places. Mom they love fiery places. Mom I have to tell you something more. They do not like cold and the next reason is they do not like storms. They like fiery places. Mom, remember that time we were at the indoor park and I played ball for a long long time? Mom. The dragons are hopping into their cave. They're eating parrot for dinner.

This is my nonstop talking almost 5-year old. He is still talking. He has been talking since 8 a.m. with a brief break when his friends came to play (thank God for Thomas and Tessa!) and a Berenstain's Bear DVD. He is cheerful but driving me batty. I think next I will try some headphones.

The Best Vegetarian Chili in the Whole Wide World

Okay, maybe not, but...
From The Bean Bible by Aliza Green

Never actually made this to the exact ingredient, but the hominy (which I've only used canned) seems to be key. As for rutabagas and celery root, hmmm.

This is a huge batch.

1 # dried hominy

1 1/2 cups dry black turtle beans, cooked and drained, or 4 cups canned

1 1/2 cups dry red kidney beans, cooked and drained, or 4 cups canned

8 cups water

4 bay leaves

1/2 cup olive oil

1 # onions, chopped

1 # carrots, diced

1/4 cup chopped garlic

2 28-oz cans chopped tomatoes

1 celery root, diced

1 rutabaga, diced

1 small butternut squash, peeled, seeded and cubed

salt & pepper

1/4 cup chopped chipotle chiles in adobo sauce (including sauce)

2 tsp. ground allspice

2 T. dried oregano

2 T. ground toasted cumin

cilantro for garnish

1. In a large bowl soak hominy in water to cover 12 hours

2. Drain, rinse, add to pot with 8 cups water and bay leaves, bring to boil, cover and simmer about 2 hours until firm but cooked through. Or you could just buy canned and skip these steps.

3. Heat olive oil. Add onions and carrots, cook a bit, add garlic, cook a bit, add tomatoes, celery root, rutabaga, simmer about 15 minutes, add squash, simmer 15 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper.

4. Add chipotle, allspice, oregano, cumin, beans and hominy. Reduce heat and cook for 2o minutes or until chili is well thickened. Garnish with cilantro.

The author recommends serving this in cooked acorn squash halves, a cute idea that I have never tried. Also, plan on freezing at least half as it is a big batch. Like any chili recipe, this tasted best cooked the day before and reheated.

I hope I don't get sued for copyright infringement. I have no idea what the rules are concerning this but seeing as only two people read this blog, if I get in trouble, I think I can figure out who ratted me out.

By the way, some shredded cheddar or jack cheese and a huge dollop of sour cream wouldn't hurt.

Today's recipes

I made three recipes today, two from Laurel's Kitchen Bread Book and this Vegetarian Chili from 101 Cookbooks. The bread items are a simple cornbread which is still baking (verdict not out) and "Sea Biscuits" which I would rather call "ship's biscuits". These seemed exciting to me, a kind of cracker made from sprouted wheat berries and rye flour, salt, baking soda, and oil. I also thought my little pirate might enjoy them...they did not go over so great, but I sure had a lot of fun sprouting the wheat!
But I am singing praises for the "chili", to which I had to, had to add celery, which I wouldn't call chili but a hippie stew in mass quantity. Just the thing to bring back last summer (fall, actually, but the sun was shining) and an amazing farm tour I went on, which concluded with live music and a feast of local food and drink. The star of the feast for me was a stew much like the one on my stove, thick with pulses and beans and grains. Anything to remember that, yes, summer DOES exist.
Try it, it's hearty!